Pushing through

16 Jul

Last time I was talking about my Spark, the energy I felt.

Reading it back it sounds like I was about to change my life around.

So what has happened since that moment? Absolutely nothing.

The next morning I felt just the same as before the spark happened. There was nothing left of that energy, that inspiration and motivation. I tried to think about all the ideas I had, but the spark didn’t come back.

What happened?
It’s not that I quit, or that it wasn’t a good idea. Realism and rational thinking caught up to me.
Fear of failure, and the nagging thought that it’s not a workable idea. The thought I can’t pull it off.

I told myself that I could just start small and work from there. No dreams of overnight success.

Still the answer to the most important question isn’t there “HOW?”

How am I going to help organize lives?
How am I going to make a template. (of what should I make a template, for what purpose)?
How am I going to grow this, should I make a website already, a blog, a twitter, a Facebook?

How am I going to make this work?

My immediate thought is, “I’m not” and I’ve given up before starting.
My idea was too vague to motivate me for longer than a spark. The once so successful campfire has gone out.

My next step is the next exercise from the book I mentioned earlier: “I could do anything, if only I knew what it was”. This means I should seriously pursue this idea for at least an hour.
An hour of complete dedication, there are no other options.
That doesn’t help me, I don’t know what my first step would be.

The simplest thing to do is make a template for something that I know.

This is where my focus will be the coming time. I can’t say it’ll be done next week. Maybe not even next month. I will work on it, and I will persist and it will get done. Then and only then can I say if this is going to work or not.

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Posted by on July 16, 2012 in Uncategorized


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